I rack disciprine.

We come to it at last, the great battle of our time.

LOLjokes school's starting. #sadlyf

All the small things

I forgot about this, I missed out on that. This was poorly done, that was poorly done. I missed this train, I missed that stop.

Overall, I had a bad long weekend.

Or so I thought.
In hindsight, none of those mattered, all of those were small things to be scattered like leaves in the wind. It really is all the good things in life that are worth dwelling on.


Today was a poor day too. I wasn't looking forward to it, and it started badly. Then it got worse. Then I got mad. Then it got worse. SO MAD.
But now I realise it was just my mind playing tricks on me. I get so caught up in all the ways that my existence is sucking, and I forget about everything/everyone else around me. If I've hurt you or done anything irrational, I most sincerely apologize.


I flicked to a random page in my Bible and found this. Thought it was fitting.

"And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast."
1 Peter 5: 10



My mind is disjointed. Deal with it (:

Lol PE

Haha!

I kid

Hi, sorry I haven't written any entries lately. I've been veeery busy.

Busy being awesome. Here are some picture of my adventures since the last post. 

Me the other day against the Warriors:

Not sure how I lost that sleeve

Me from my boxing days:

Just me havin' a ball:

 

All hail

All hail Kerry the Master of Sass.
All hail King Grace and Queen Catherine of Sass. (I actually out-sass them by a long shot, but I just have no desire to rule, just to pass on my knowledge of sass.)

There is one person that I know I can rely on 99.99% of the time.
Whether it's moral advice, study tips, driving me around, emotional support or if I'm just being an idiot, my brother always points me in the right direction. I'm eternally grateful. Being the younger sibling, I've had it easy and I've always looked up to his guidance. We've also pretty much never fought - not since like Yr 2 :L. I'll be happy if I become half the man he is.
The 0.01% is left to account for when Anna is in town. Then I won't see him for days. lol.

In junior school, I was somewhat of an idiot ( still am obviously). I don't think anyone would have pegged me as a potential cadet leader or SRC rep or prefect :L. I was much too caught up in my own little world to have cared for any of these things. Even at the start of Year 11, I didn't put much thought into it. When SRC elections came around, things just snowballed XD. I'm not one to toot my own horn, but I think I've grown a lot since then (not height-wise, I'm still a midget lawl).
You probably all know how much of a natural leader Jess is. I'm quite thankful for her. She really has been the driving force behind all the SRC and Prefect activities I've had the pleasure of working on. That boy is amazing. loljks she's actually a girl.
Jess is always on top of things, getting all the small details planned out to the t.
I tend to be the one that gets people working and gets things going on the day.
Chelsea is the one that gets us all the nice things because noone can stand her charms :)
I think we complement each other quite well :)

I tend to be a strange person (not as strange as Grace of course). It may partially be why I am forever alone/ have no friends. Here's my list:

1) I shake my butt too well. All the boys want to be with me and all the girls want to be me. LOLjks that's weird.
2) I'm very good at dishing it out but I tend not to take it so well. On the other hand, Mark takes it well but he has no idea how to dish it out :L
3) I tend to open up more to my female friends than to my mates (other than Jack, cuz we're basically family. lol.) But then I don't just sit around talking with them as much and playing footy with girls isn't much fun so I tend to drift around. I'm a drifter.
4) I can't think on my feet. Well usually I can - I have no problem with public speaking, but if I ever get put on the spot, talking to that one girl, I get verbal constipation. Vibrant imagery is required to demonstrate my sheer awkwardness.
5) This will sound weird, but I actually have too many friends to have friends. ie I struggle to develop meaningful connections and make close friends.
6) I'm way too naive and ignorant when it comes to relationships. How do you talk to a girl? How do you not sweat profusely/stutter/ trip over awkwardly when you see that person? What happens on a date? These are questions I cannot answer.
7) I blow up situations in my head and I panic. Mountains out of molehills anyone?
8) I smell too much like grass and BO all the time. Footy, basketball, cycling, soccer, gymming. I can't help it if I smell like rotten eggs by Period 2.
9) I joke way too much and I sometimes cross the line without realising. It's all fun and games until it's not fun and games.
10) I've been told that I'm a little scary and unapproachable. I've noticed and it's not necessarily a bad thing :L If I don't feel like talking to anyone, I put my earphones in and put on an angry face. And so  divided the Red sea asunder. The Red Sea being juniors and people I find annoying. hurhur.

I'm just awkward and hyperactive and forever alone ok? >>

Just keep swimming

Last swimming carnival ever!

Now I remember why I always promised myself to go swimming in the holidays.

My whole body actually feels so rejuvenated after swimming today.

I feel so energised, as if I could run a marathan right now. lawl.

I realised today that all of the Yr 12s are having their 'lasts' for a lot of things. Soon, HSC will be over and we'll all end up never really seeing each other. Sad :(

Thank God for friends. They're the bestest. 

No Grace, you don't count.

Kerrooster

Stars

In your multitude
Scarce to be counted

A million kudos to all the Prefects and everyone that supported us through these last few weeks. You're all stars in your own way.

Deep and meaningful Les Mis reference out of the way.
Brainmindthoughtvomit has the stage.

It's been a week of becoming more mature - physically and emotionally.
I've conditioned my body to sleep and wake at outrageous hours for days on end. Lol jokes I live 2 minutes from school. I've also never been much of a dancer but I don't think I'll ever forget the moves to GYC, ALAYLM or CIHTD. Ever. EVER. EVERR!
I've also learnt a great deal about dealing with people when they and I are both under significant stress.
Note: For me, becoming more mature doesn't mean I'll be any less of a retard.

It's also been a week of firsts and lasts.
First time I've 'bounced' someone from a school dance. LOLOL. Yada I hope you're proud of me. Nah it wasn't really even a bounce. A newbie brought his gurlfran from another school and there was a bit of an altercation with the prefects at the door, so they brought in some reinforcements - Doorman Kerrooster. I just went up to the guy, shook his hand and explained the rules to him, asked if he could arrange safe transport home and organised a refund. Apparently I was very smooth, but seriously, I kinda jumped into the deep end and made it up as I went. Hurhur
Last time I'll ever help run a school dance. This is the best one I've ever had the pleasure of participating in. All the prefects looked good as well. The boys cleaned up well and the ladies were quite the sight :L
First time taking part in running an assembly production. Legit, I was lying in bed last night, tossing and turning - doing the moves to GYC. Full credit to the scriptwriters, singers, choreos, techies and absolutely everyone.
First time I've ever overemotionalhappy cried and then suddenly emotionalsad cried. Teary spluttering happy sad runny-nose cried. Sometimes men cry. Haters gonna hate. I'm pretty sure Jess/Chelsea/ Nathan thought I was a complete weirdo :L

Swimming carnival on Monday. Did somebody order rock hard buns and washboard abs?
Because I lost mine in the wash lol. Sorry to disappoint.

Kerrooster

Week 1

Was only 3 days but it was just so packed :(
CNY stuff on monday and VDay in 2 weeks time. There just feels like there's so little time for everything. Yet I'm here - cataloguing and archiving emotions.
ATM out of all my subjects, english has got be my least favourite. Pretty sure I'm not the only one with such sentiments.

Daniel came back from his random trip today. I realised that I missed him. lol. Although the house was much more peaceful without him trying to be Jean Valjean all the time.

Also, It hit me today that for the first time, I kind of forgot that my mum wasn't around the house. It completely didn't register that she was overseas - I just forgot about mum. Entirely.
What's wrong with me D=?

RIP...

...senior prio. You were taken away from us too early. <continue eulogy>
Really doesnt affect me except when I have to go to the library when my rents are being overly noisy or to tutoring. I can see why the execs would make such a decision, but to seniors and their parents, it really doesn't make sense. I knew how to catch buses  when I was a junior....

House is really quiet because Mum's still overseas and Daniel's gone to Port Macquarie to get slizzard with other future doctors. lawl jokes about the slizzard part.

Anyhow, first day of school was pretty good. As in, it was a tough day but I feel like my positive attitude helped me through it yaknow? lawl. No but seriously, I was a particularly annoying retard today but being like that helps me keep sane so I shall continue to do so. Even when I got home today, i kept cracking jokes with my dad hurhur.Without crossing the line, I would really recommend letting loose and being childish when things get a little tough because it will help you stay at the peak of the stress- productivity bell curve.
also known as the Xue continuum.

In summary; first day of week 1 was good. 36 weeks and 2 days left. I think.

Do You even lift?

Most Ruse guys don't. Until they go to Uni. Then they come back to presentation days and stuff. And they're huge. Random epiphany I had lololol.

Had 5 Hours of Du yesterday. Jack and Mark had 8 lollololol.
I was so high that when he asked 'how many lines  can you draw through 3 non-linear points?" I said 1. lol.

Spent a good deal of last night sorting out Vday Assembly stuff.
Being  a cadet taught me that in order to get something one, you have to effectively delegate. It works. With disciplined cadets. Not so well with Prefects on holidays in their HSC year.

Anna left on Thursday and Daniel spent most of the last few days with her. Apparently he cried at the airport. lololol nub. I've never seen him emotional cry before :L. He's been pretty quiet lately >> I've spent the last few days sarcastically patting him on the shoulder and I don't think that's helping :L

I'm trying to coax my brain into school mode but it's not really working ><

Kinda looking forward to school. But not really, Yaknow?

Meds brah

As some of you may know, my mum is somewhat of a nutritionist and nutrition entrepreneur. As such, she has access to a lot of resources. As I was trawling through her folder on my computer (to free up hard disk space hurhur), I discovered a documentary called Foodmatters. It drew focus on the importance of nutrition to allow the human body to engage its own healing processes - rather than relying on conventional "pill for every ill" medicine. It really intrigued meand I was on the edge of my seat for the whole 1 hour and 32 minutes. Extended edition, biatch.

It got me thinking about what I career I really wanted to follow. So, I spent some time researching medical specialties and more obscure medicine-related courses. These are some that were the most interesting to me:

Medical specialties ( >2 years of postgraduate training in workplace)
-  Rheumatology
-  Sports and Exercise Medicine
-  Emergency Medicine

Applied sciences - BAppSc
- Exercise and sport science + Masters in Nutrition and dietetics
- Exercise physiology
- Physiotherapy

Alternative medicines - only offered by dodgy, hippy looking unis
-  Nutritional and Environmental medicines
-  Nutritional Medicine

Having to see a physio/Exercise physiologist for a while really piqued my interest in sports medicine and that's what I've wanted to do for a while now.

Nutrition and health are also points of interest because of the exposure I've had to it.
About 3 years ago, Mum took the whole family to Sanoviv Health Institute in Tijuana, Mexico for a week. Tijuana? That place is like superdrugdealerkidnapperdodgy right? Yeah it is. We were actually picked up in San Diego and driven there by like some ex-special forces driver guy. The actual institute itself is really isolated on the coast, walled off and super safe though.
The main reason we went was because Mum's health at the time wasn't too good and she wanted to basically get a whole body checkup for her and Dad. She also wanted me and Daniel to come along because the place is super awesome.

Food: Everything was organic/home grown, low-carb, low sodium, no prior processing. Breakfasts were combinations of vegetable/fruit smoothies, poached eggs, steamed vegeatables. Lunch/ dinner were MOSTLY vegetarian and raw -  massive self-serve salad bar. None of your disgusting fatty dressings though - lemon juice, olive oil, sun dried tomato you get the idea. the mian course was usually vegetarian as well and low-carb = brown rice, salmon, vege sushi etc. You get the idea.

Medical professionals: everything under the sun. Cardiologists, immunologists, haemotologists, nutritionists, neurologists, chiropractors etc etc. Everything was holistic and focused on nutrition.

Anyway, the main gist of it was that it was heavily focused on creating a healthy environment for the body to heal itself. No pills. No prescriptions. and it worked. After a week, all the blood tests, urine samples, blood pressures, dental imaging - everything that my mum and dad got tested for came back a whole lot better than before. Intense, eh?

Mum also sent Daniel and me to the nutrionists to get checked. They made a program for us and for about 3 months after that, Daniel and I had fresh salads for every meal. EVERY. MEAL. It got pretty tough but it was extremely beneficial.

Anyway, that was a long rant, but that's how I got really interested in nutrition. lol.

Researching this stuff really highlighted the amount of education and training I still have in store before I can enter this field. Still have HSC to go as well lololololol.

Maths will be the end of me

Heat

On the "hottest day in record for 154 years" for Sydney, I:

1. Woke up at 6 to go cycling with Daniel. Eastwood - Meadowbank - Rhodes - Olympic Park - Silverwater - Rydalmere - Carlo. Took about 2 hours. Aside from the bruises on my butt, cycling is so fun!
2. Practiced dancing from 1020-1600 for Prefects VDay Assembly - that was hot. See, there are hot days, then there are HOT days. Yesterday was a HOT day. Many different degrees of hotness.I tip my hat to the choreos that were there from 9-5. Also, Grace (I know you'll see this eventually) - you're a poorly temperature regulated, 2-left footed hops lacking, heel-wearing beetroot. Let's be friends :) 
3. Chilled in mah dungeon - or basement if you prefer that term. Had to put up with the most nauseating person in the world - Ja-chelle. Man he/she is annoying. I remember when I was little, I would spend a whole day down there because it was so cool. Used to pretend I was a barrister and serve up deadly concoctiosn that would invariably cause Daniel to die slow painful deaths. My parents used to also hide junk food down there, so Daniel and I would go on expeditions to root out all the forbidden goodies. hurhurhur
4. Went to a buffet for dinner. By that point, I hadn't realised that the last substantial food I consumed was mid-morning. Me was ravenous :(. Dad ceebsed to cook since it was so hot so we just went out to eat buffet. 

Obviously, yesterday was searingly, roastingly hot. But frankly, it didn't really register for me because I spent it with people that are the most important to me (aside from Ja-chelle -  he/she is really, really annoying). 

That's led me to the realization that for every single "hardship", there are 100000x billion ways to address it and overcome it. If God brought me to it, then He will bring me through it.

- except for Ja-chelle

Infinity and...

First blog in a while hurhur.

Despite things being more busy now, I think I'm actually going to blog more because it will actually help me be more productive.

I've realised that blogging is a form of "emotional archiving" and when my thoughts stray, I've found that cataloging them and getting them out of my head helps to organise them. As such, this blog is going to become a "thought dump". I'm not gonna spend any time formatting or anything once I engage in this textual diarrhea so these entries will look quite spammy and will most likely be riddled with typos

It'll also help me practise typing - I realise that my typing is excruciatingly slow compared to most people (my mum excluded). As we all know, practise and repetition of an action helps to build neural connections in the brain and in future, the same action/task can be reproduced more fluently. Hoorah.

Aaaanyway end of last year was a blur. I pretty much never spent a day at home after annual because it felt like everyone wanted a piece of me ;). Christmas was a little anti-climactic lurl. Went to ECC on Christmas morning and that was good. But I still feel like I havent found a church where I feel comfortable. Notsureof what's going on in my head.

Prefect stuff for VDay and CNY has been quite intense. I know that it's inevitable, but it really has been quite enraging when some prefects consistently brush off their prefect commitments for minute and inconsiderate excuses. The attendance at many meetings - barring those overseas - has barely exceeded fifty percent and I find that absurd. But, nevertheless, I realise it is quite impossible to get a group of thirty-two year twelves to meet up on the same day in these holidays.

BUT there really shouldnt be any excuse for people not pulling their weight when they've been assigned something to plan/organise. For all the talk of the prefects being a big team, in the end, it frequently comes down to a few people who team carry. I won't mention names because these people are my colleagues, but I just had to get that rant out. Feeling good.

As far as study goes, I've been doing quite poorly. lawl :(

:( English: Literally dozed off, watching Blade runner until I heard a gunshot. Struggled through about a third of Frankenstein.

:( Maths: still catching up on stuff I missed last year :(

:) Phys: I've made notes on the first two modules and I've almost finished dotpoint questions for them.

:) Chem: bout the same as phys.

:| PE: LOL its PE

UMAT

UMAT

UMAT

:(

"Studying" for UMAT is actually quite fun though. Getting the question right and seeing that your train of though matched the solution feel pretty good. Section two is apparently my strong point and Section three is my worst. I'm a girl. lol.

Speaking of girls...

loljks that's just for me to know.

Plenty more to get done these holidays. And the rest of this year. and forever and ever and ever.

If you've made it this far, you either have no life or you're a stalker. Or both. Leave your name so I know who actually knows this still exists. Pls?

 

Today was a very blonde day

and it kinda sucked....

Pain almost over! Just 2 more days........

Soo...

I've been pretty busy lately, trying to stay afloat.
There is just so much to do that I wonder if its possible to actually do everything.
Mum came back from China after 2 months. Now the house is 1000x noisier, with the phone ringing and the TV blaring. Quite annoying.
Everyone has so much to do and i'm struggling to comprehend how its all possible.
Right now it just seems everyone/everything wants a chunk of my time/effort.
Not trying to seem self-important or anything but thats just how it feels.
I tend to think that things used to be much better and more enjoyable, that things are becoming less so. Maybe its just that my tolerance for bs is decreasing.


Currently trying to learn complex numbers myself. Little progress.

I have no time for this madness.
You'll have to settle for a maths joke.

Challenge me

to make me stronger.

Correspondence

Haven't had much time for that lately because everything is rush
                    rush
rush                                                                          rush
                                              rush                                                                     rush

lollol.

Cue montage of scattered thoughts

Filming prefect video in the next week or so is going to be tiring. Full creds to Jack She for his technical genius.

The coming exams are near the end of the term so we don't get to use the previous holidays to get ready. I have a hunch that with everything going on, they're going to rush up really quickly and I'm going to die. rololol.

Floundering in maths :(
That sucks too.

Also I've realised that with everything going on, I've been socially awkward and immature to compensate for my stressedoutness. I've also lost my temper a few times and thats been worrying.

Went to see the physio on Thursday which was good. Little bit awkward because the physio was a girl and my injury is near my butt (necessitating the removal of my pants). Still, my leg felt pretty good afterwards.

I've also realised that sport has brought all the guys in the grade together. With the basketball courts out of bounds now, all the ballers have been playing footy (even Niro) and we've destroyed them lololol. In year 7, the sport you played kind of determined who you were friends with lollol.

end thought vomit.

'Til next time. :)

Kerry

Temporary Freedom :)

Bombed Ag - it's kays. only one more Ag exam ever lololol.

After school, went to Eastwood and bumped into RD + James. Went with RD to get his haircut at a korean place - pretty awks XD. Shav came and we just talked about bitches for a while. LOLjks that's weird - just caught up and discussed current affairs such as Channel 9's appalling coverage of the Olympics.

Chilled for a bit until they left, then met up with Chatface and the Angry Shang Woman (ASW for short). Went to Breadtop and tried to study while ASW violated my phone and photos and facebook and instagram and etcetc. Went to Taste of ShangHai for dindins which was pretty lol. We spiked Chatface's tea with vinegar when she went to the ATM. Pretty comical reaction on her part as well. Other immature behaviour such as chopstick licking ensued - I took no part in that btw.

Went to Praus and just as we were leaving, Gangnam Style came on, so we just ROTL'ed while other people there laughed at us. (Rolling on table laughing)

At the train station, ASW got dirties from two err homosexual looking young women (they were like making out and stuff). When we got away from them, we ROTL'ed again. (Rolling on train laughing)

Went to WACD (1 Samuel 17) which was good - looked into the details that are often overlooked with that passage.

Played water pong with Jemus and Waffleface then went home.

lollol I lead an interesting life.

Anyhow - I learnt from Ag that I left too little time to study so I will definitely change that for prelims. Time to get a'crackin'! 

Auf Wiedersehen!

- Kerrbear

Ups and Downs

Everything's gonna have ups and downs...
Lately, I've been trying to push myself "up" and try to enjoy everything as much as possible. Went pretty well from Monday to Thursday, but then everything kind of caught up again on Friday. :(
Don't want to bore you with the details, but I kind of hit the dip after a sugar high, you know? There wasn't actually any sugar involved, fyi.

Anyhow, As the icing on the cake, I lost my maths folder. I've been behind on maths since last term and I was finally catching up when I lost all my work for the last month. Me sad :( At first, I thought I just forgot to bring it to school, but then it wasn't at home. I remembered that I actually brought it to school, so either someone's being a total sack of * or I'm beginning to develop short term memory loss. :(

Also turns out that I've begun developing compensatory injuries everywhere. Without using any medical terms, my posture's basically being affected by my injured hamstring tendon near the bottom of my butt. I stand unevenly now and It's been affecting my back and other leg. It also turns out hamstring tendon injuries never really go away, and even with proper physiotherapy, it's always gonna be weaker than my other leg. Me sad :(

This blog is turning into a despairfest, so have a photo of a baby porcupine.


Kerrooster